In this ever moving and fast paced world, people are so busy that they merely depend on alcohol for their relaxation, which makes the situation worse when they go home to their families. Living with an alcoholic is not easy, as people that are addicted to alcohol can barely show signs of change and transformation, unless they are taken to a counseling session. Living with such addicts may cause embarrassment and pettiness. Alcoholic people are kind of introverted and that is what makes the addiction grow. Living with an alcoholic spouse has several consequences like; children may be under a bad impression because parents are the only ones who show them the right way to lead life, and one of the major disadvantages of drinking alcohol is that it results in several medical hazards. Many people are trying to reform their spouses and make them free from this bad habit, but do not succeed eventually. There are, however, certain ways to do that. Some of them are:

Let the natural consequences happen while your spouse is under the influence, like for instance, do not pick them up when they fall or do not help them, this will make the person realize their mistake more quickly and easily. Repeating this process again and again can help your life attain an ease while living with an alcoholic. Most of the alcoholics are introverts and they do not want to mingle with the society. Help them become extroverts and mix up with people who do not drink or smoke. A good company always helps people reform their habits.

Find More Living With An Alcoholic Spouse Articles

Here are some roles that you will find in a alcoholic family. Do they sound familiar?

• The caretaker: This is usually played by an adult in the family. They make sure everything is taken care of. The bills are paid, the shopping is done, the house is clean, etc. The caretaker is so busy taking care of everthing and everyone else that he/she has no time for his/her own needs.
• The scapegoat: This is the person who seems to get the blame for everything. If the alcoholic trips over something, it is because the scapegoat left it out. The focus changes from the alcoholic being drunk to the scapegoat being lazy by not putting things away.
• The hero: This is the over achiever. The child who tries hard to succeed in everything. The one who makes the family look good. However, even the hero’s feelings get overlooked in an alcoholic family.
• The clown: If this person keeps everyone laughing, no one will cry – right? However, many times the humor prevents healing in the family. Instead of facing the problem, the laughter distracts from it.
• The lost child: This child doesn’t say much, just keeps to himself. He might like to watch TV, play video games, or stay in his room. He is overlooked because he is so quiet. But he is observing more than you know.

Can you see these roles in your family? It is time to break the cycle. For yourself and your children – let them know what it is really like to be a kid! There is hope for alcoholic families. I have mentioned Al-Anon before, there is also Alateen for teenagers.

There are many books on the market that help you break free from codependency roles. Reading a chapter before bed can help put positive thought in your hear and in turn, help you start the next day with a new perspective.

We have all experienced guilt at some time in our lives. And face it, guilt can be a great motivator! We feel guilty we made a huge mess so we hurry to clean it up. We feel guilt for leaving the kids home with a sitter so we bring home ice cream and a DVD to watch with them.

But, when your life is consumed by guilt – there is no motivation. In fact, you seem to have lost your will to go on. So guilt has the reverse effect. You feel so guilty that you can’t function, and then you feel even more guilty because you are not getting anything done. Now throw in an alcoholic spouse or significant other and the guilt goes through the roof!

One thing we need to always remember is that the guilt that is piled on us by and alcoholic or addict it THEIR guilt. It is not ours and we do not need to own up to it. Alcoholics have an amazing way of making their spouses crazy with guilt! After all, according to them, everything that goes wrong in their life is our fault. Because it certainly isn’t theirs! Alcoholics and addicts need to have someone to blame, it makes them feel better about what they are doing to themselves. If they can push the blame off, they do not have to claim the truth. Yes, it is an ugly thing that they do to us, but it is what they do.

So, what I want you to understand is IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!! No matter how much your significant other tries to blame you, you did not cause his alcoholism or addiction. Remind yourself of this daily and start to break free from the guilt!