Alcoholism has been called the ‘Family Disease’ because it affects everyone in the family to some extent. In many families, all the members have become enablers. By refusing to admit there is a problem in their family, they are all allowing the destructive behavior to continue.
Just like Alcoholics Anonymous has helped millions of alcoholics, Al-Anon is there for the family. The spouse who is struggling with codependency will find hope and healing at Al-Anon.
People who are codependent have a belief system that is linked to how they relate to someone else. Usually that someone else is an alcoholic or drug addict. Codependents identify their life and well being to how things are going for the alcoholic. They believe that what they are doing is what is best. But doing what they think is best for the alcoholic/addict, could destroy themselves.
This is a tough question – Do you fear the recovery of your addict? Of course you want the alcoholic/addict in your life to get better. Life would be better if they were in recovery – right? But wait, how does recover affect me? Who will I take care of? How will their recovery change my identity? Think hard and answer the question again – do you fear the recovery of your addict?
I found this handout at a codependency group meeting I went to. It has helped me so much that I want to share it. Use it and believe it – it will help you! Read more »
What is it with guilt? I feel guilt about EVERYTHING! My daughter’s date is late, I feel guilt. WHY? I wasn’t driving him! Yet, I still feel guilt. I don’t understand why I feel guilty about everything – why someone is sad, when the local sports team loses, when my husband has a bad day. The list could go on and on. The point is – I am NOT GUILTY for any of this! Now I just need to convince myself.
Did you know that at least one fourth of the population is in a family that is affected by addiction? Not just a relative who is an alcoholic/addict, but a first-degree relative! Close to 90% of all actively addicted persons live with their family or a significant other. That family or significant other is you, me and everyone else affected by addiction and who struggles with codependency.
Codependency is a term that we seem to hear a lot, but what does it really mean? If a person is codependent are they a bad person? Are they crazy? Just what is Codependency?
The dictionary definition is:
